For the love of a lousy buck...

I occasionally share my most tasteful tweets.

Sun, 19 May 2013 01:45:24 -0400

I occasionally share my most tasteful tweets.

10000bc: since abercrombie an fitch destroys its unsold clothes and wont donate bc poor people...

Sun, 19 May 2013 01:41:41 -0400

since abercrombie an fitch destroys its unsold clothes and wont donate bc poor people wearing their clothes gives them a bad image i say everyone should donate as much abercrombie and fitch brand clothing that you have to homeless shelters so you can simultaneously piss off a shitty company and help those in need

I say donating it and hoping it ends up on unattractive homeless people is a dick move but it’s not a full on dick powerplay. I think you should cruise the streets looking for a really fat dude with enough open sores that he can slide down the street like a slug. Come on people, lean into this one. I would help but I don’t have any of that crap and never did.

Picnic time on the mean streets of Santa Clara University. (at...

Sat, 18 May 2013 18:19:27 -0400

Picnic time on the mean streets of Santa Clara University. (at Santa Clara University Ignatius Lawn)

Happiness ruins Tumblr.

Sat, 18 May 2013 03:59:09 -0400

I get some ideas for posts. Mostly negative things. Things I don’t like. NASCAR. Go sit on a fucking overpass in a wifebeater with a 30-pack of Bud Lights and a bag of sunflower seeds and have yourself a time. Normally, I could get a whole post out of that.

Star Trek? I’m old enough to have been there for Star Trek when it came on TV. No one fucking cared. No one. It was on for three years and basically got beaten senseless in the ratings by My Three Sons and Gomer Pyle and then was mercifully removed from the airwaves. It was a failed TV show. Not a lifestyle. If you’d get out of your mom’s basement, it would all become clear to you.

My Dish Network harddrive crashed about a week ago. Only one TV in the house works. I watch Giants games on it. I have no TV in my bedroom right now. Normally I would rail about that but right now, it doesn’t seem to be a big deal. I finally called yesterday to get a new one. I’ll have it in about a week. While I was on the phone, I cancelled about 457 channels and cut my bill in half. I told the nice woman from Bangalore (probably) that as it turns out, I only need one channel (the one that has the Giants) but in a cruel joke, I have to buy another 230 “basic” channels to get it. Basic? Basic is air, water, Giants baseball and a small amount of food. And Dylan. But I digress.

I’m finding it hard to blow up minor annoyances into full-blown rants. If I were Keith Moon right now, I’d tidy up a hotel room. If I were Chris Brown, I’d give Rihanna a footrub. If I were Dick Cheney, I’d not bomb a country full of brownish people.

I’m growing soft and complacent maybe. I’ll stop short of using the “L” word but my own sister accused me of being in it yesterday. My own sister.

And one of my kids and my mom and three people at work.

Just when you think it can’t happen.

It’s probably best to not overthink these things.

NASCAR is for morons.

Pretty amazing Bob Dylan lived through the drugs and just being...

Sat, 18 May 2013 00:56:54 -0400

Pretty amazing Bob Dylan lived through the drugs and just being Bob Dylan. At least the Beatles could deflect to other Beatles. Dylan didn’t have another Dylan to tag team with.

My barista is moving to Hawaii. This is her last day making a...

Fri, 17 May 2013 11:07:48 -0400

My barista is moving to Hawaii. This is her last day making a triple grande dry nonfat cappuccino for me. I think she’s pretty excited about that.

A week and a half ago, I heard a bar band play a 10 minute version of "Wagon Wheel".

Thu, 16 May 2013 18:14:01 -0400

And it’s been in my head and my mouth and on my lips ever since.

Chillaxin’. (at The Chillaxin Spot)

Thu, 16 May 2013 16:02:45 -0400

Chillaxin’. (at The Chillaxin Spot)

joshmosh415: I can never stop posting this. The narrow minded...

Thu, 16 May 2013 13:25:17 -0400

joshmosh415:

I can never stop posting this. The narrow minded bible fanatics that just look at one small thing in the bible then feed the world with their hate over it. At the same time they ignore all the other silly laws made by man they claimed were made by god. These gif’s say it all.

While I find this disrespectful to those who wear garments made from two different threads, I approve this message.

My Tumblr Crushes:sarahsmileawhile (5%)jusky (3%)smuttercup...

Thu, 16 May 2013 12:19:26 -0400

My Tumblr Crushes:

Hey! Go give these people a try. Wonderful Tumblrs.

I always say I don't watch much television.

Wed, 15 May 2013 23:51:23 -0400

But the tv in the bedroom has been out for a week and now I miss my crappy shows. It will be out for another week. Redboxing it.

My Mother’s Day card is going out 3 days late and...

Wed, 15 May 2013 20:15:56 -0400

My Mother’s Day card is going out 3 days late and it’s in a language my Mom doesn’t speak but this is a HUGE improvement over last year.

Shit just got real.

Wed, 15 May 2013 19:13:10 -0400

My ShakeWeight and my Fleshlight found out about each other. It’s going to be awkward tonight.

The triumphant story of Joanie the Jehovah Witness...

Wed, 15 May 2013 13:11:05 -0400

The triumphant story of Joanie the Jehovah Witness Stripper.

Paul Thorn. I could listen to him talk all damn day.

twitter-gossip: This is hilarious that @buck4itt was making a...

Wed, 15 May 2013 12:22:27 -0400

twitter-gossip:

This is hilarious that @buck4itt was making a joke and @theleanover, who recently went to @twitter - so he knows what they do - had to make that tweet more factual…. what a jerk.

It’s even funnier that @buck4itt was more worried about grammar errors.

White people problems.

Know more than us? Let us know.

That’s racist. I’m one pissed off African right now.

Comedy 102.7 - Fan Favorite Contest

Wed, 15 May 2013 12:17:04 -0400

Comedy 102.7 - Fan Favorite Contest:

If you click on this link and vote for Chris Tellez today, he’ll come over and help you paint your house. If you rent, he knows a guy with a truck and the next time you move, they’ll come over and help you with the heavy stuff.

mynamekyle: SHE LOOKS AWFUL BUT MARIAH LOOKS GREAT SO SHE...

Wed, 15 May 2013 03:16:06 -0400

mynamekyle:

SHE LOOKS AWFUL

BUT MARIAH LOOKS GREAT SO SHE POSTED IT ANYWAY

TRUE MARIAH MOMENT

Not many celebrities have the courage to post their own “after” picture.

Relentless? “Play” is the verb....

Wed, 15 May 2013 02:25:43 -0400

Relentless? “Play” is the verb. “Relentless” is an adverb. Adverbs end in -ly. The comma? It’s not necessary. This issue will not be settled until an editorial intern is fed into a woodchipper.

Bryce Harper vows to play as relentlessly as ever. What’s not to like about that?

I’m tired of doing your fucking job, Yahoo Sports.

When it comes to the impressing the ladies, Cash the...

Wed, 15 May 2013 00:33:32 -0400

When it comes to the impressing the ladies, Cash the Wonderpoodle and I are irresistible. @lolaverses says “delusional”. Maybe we’re delusistible.

Reunited with the Wonderpoodle. (at Baby Hudson’s Poodle...

Tue, 14 May 2013 23:58:11 -0400

Reunited with the Wonderpoodle. (at Baby Hudson’s Poodle Palace)